ok, so as i was writing and having my accounts deleted of the last few weeks laura was writing a much more comprehensible email with many bits that i missed out. so here it is. i'd also like to add though that the 'tight corner' laura so kindly refers to was actually a teenily thin, cars close on either side, barely able to even fit a car down it (worse than our street han) dead end road, with nowhere to turn or maneouvre. so much worse and more difficult than she makes out!! anyway here you are...
Thought maybe it was time for another update on mine and Fi's star spangled summer. The exciting news is we finally left LA, after being gently reminded by several sources that travelling was supposed to entail visiting more than one city a month, we packed our comedically overized suitcases and said a tearful goodbye to the walk of fame.
The thing is we had it really good in LA, firstly staying with Ali's friend Dean who refused to let us sleep on the futon or sofa and insisted we take his bed, and use the swimming pool as often as we liked, then moving on to Mike's. He's a friend of Fi's sister and an artist on King of the Hill, his house actually looks like some sort of old school Hollywood Museum, its littered with old film mermorabilia and we slept in a custom made pirate room whilst we were there. He's also a total artist by lifestyle (and by that I mean natural enemy of order, routine and sobriety) When he wasnt trying to force feed us Margarita's at 11am or educate our taste in films (he rented the entire Godfather trilogy and I suddenly understand why all men are obsessed with it - amazing and Al Pacine = sex god) then he would do stuff like cook us dinner, making little animals out of the vegtables, or after watching Shaun of the Dead take us up to his roof and make us recreate the back garden scene by throwing old LP records off the roof (Fi's and Mike flew about 20 ft, mine rebounded on a post i front of my head, shattered and nearly left me blind in one eye)
The thing was as lovely as Mikes house was, it was in a totally ropey area - the centre of female Mexican gang warfare in LA (Mike has bullet holes in his car where he was shot at) complete with a real life Godfather and THE female gang leader living next door. At first we were both a little worried we might wake up to find horses head at the foot of our beds, but Michelle was really cool and it was weirdly re-assuring having her around. Especially one memorable night when we, convinced the house was being broken into risked our lives walking into the living room - me using my phone as a torch (with 911 already dialled) and Fi threateningly wielding one of Mike's doc martins (the heaviest object we could find) to call Michelle, only to find the worlds largest racoon going through the trash...it was hardly a scene from Scarface, but racoons sound deceptively scary.
I was also in a chemist when apparently there was a hold-up, four cops burst in holding guns and ran up to the cashier who was serving me saying: 'are you the one who called in the hold up?' The cashier just looked blankly at the cop and made a monosyllabic 'I dont know whats going on and I dont care mate, I'm on minimum wage' grunt. I walked out whilst Fi was phoning me from the carpark confused as to why three more cop cars had pulled up and asked her if she had been the one to dial 911. We just drove home with our cereal but the road was cordoned off for the rest of the night with about another five copcars up the street and we have no clue what actually happened.
Anyway we finally left for Orange County and it was all going well til on the way to get some food on the first night Fi was trying to do a 3 point turn on a tight corner and after a while all these people drinking on a rooftop were laughing, i just thought (not unreasonably) that it was at Fi's driving, but after a while i wound down the window and they shouted 'you do realise you just hit our fire hydrant with your car' at which point we looked horrified and they shouted 'there's only one thing for it, you better come up here and have a few Margarita's to make it up to us'...God Bless America! Anyway the guy Tommy and his friends hung out with us for a few days and we saw them on Independence Day - which was not as crazy as the yanks would have you believe (I have come to realise that the Brits really do party the hardest) but we did get to see Kanye West...yumyumyum. The O.C. was beautiful and like the TV show just reaks of money, there's people no older than 17 driving top-of the range, brand new 4x4's everywhere you look and the beach is the quickest way to give yourself a complex - being totally full of perfectly toned, bronzed and (i like to think lipo'd) babes...ome people stand in the darkness, afraid to step into the light...
As much as i love the yanks, it was a relief to meet up with a couple of English lads we knew through friends of friends and we've travelled with them for the past couple of weeks. We met them in a bar in LA and after much sambucca, Jack Daniels, dodgy dancing and a slightly embarassing 'getting kicked out of the Church of Scientology Building for answering their phones at 3am' incident, we decided to opt for safety in numbers and travel together. We've crammed so much in with them, three towns in Mexico (where we couldnt walk three feet without the boys being offered Viagra,) camping and hiking in Joshua Tree national park, camping at the Grand Canyon and spending nerly a week in San Diego, thats its really wierd now theyve left (especially as they did all the driving, cooking, organising and planning)
So then there was two, and we're currently in Texas, which is cool, though you get pestered a lot and no one ever walks anywhere (prob why there are quite a few fattyfattybumbums) so it draws attention. No joke we were walking down the road in Pheonix 2 days ago and after being honked about 12 times (I should add we both looked hideous - the sweatiest of betty's) a truck actually slowed down and I swear to god he thought we were hookers. Needless to say we were completely freaked out and ran to the nearest shop to call a taxi. On the bright side everyone here calls you 'ma'm' which is amazing, I keep resisting the urge to tell people I'm not 'ma'm' material, that I dont deserve that much respect and that they can just address me as 'miss' or even 'OI YOU' but we're both enjoying it too much. Going to see where JFK was assasinated tomorrow, the grassy knoll, the book depositry where Lee Harvey Oswald supposedly shot him etc. sounds morbid but it should be really interesting, then onto New Orleans where we're hoping we can still spend some time, we figure the tourist industry needs all the money it can get after hurricane Katrina....
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
crickets in dallas
right well i just wrote a huge witty informative blah blah blah bit about the 'whats the worst that could happen' tour of america and the stupid computer suddenyl deleted it. which makes you feel like you really dont want to write it all again but instead throw the computer on the floor. unfortunately we are in our lovely hotel lobby so i dont think it would be too appropriate. so what i had just written and was about to...
Giant flying crickets in dallas... only made it out of the hotel for some nightlife spotting (hmmm) for about an hour before we had to return, well run and jump and scream, to the hotel because they were so horrific. cant describe how bad, people prob thinking bit pathetic but they are EVERYWHERE. and HUGE. i've decided i actually like cockroaches after enduring those for a night. shudder.
So much more need to tell from before, missed out a huge chunk... so back in time, not sure where to start... vegas, amazing, too hot, rank hot dry wind, cant go out during the day, (original casino owner is a genius) but fun in casinos, although everyone v serious about the gambling and me and laura know very little and putting bets of $20 (high rollers), go to studio 54, see hundreds of brides and wedding parties, stay at the mgm, beautiful room, unfortunately dont make our millions or see george or brad. little disappointing. see hoover dam and then back to poor mike's for a bit after im sure he thought he was rid of us for good! have bit of worrying jounrey for a bit when the 'engine transmission exhaust or sth' light comes on telling us something is wrong. decide best way to deal with it is to keep on driving as quickly as possible to get back to LA. miraculously, no idea how, the light turns itself off so the clever car sorted itself out (i think it was my excellent driving which did so).
back in LA, chill, try to sort rest of stay out for a bit. meet laura's friend's friend's friends (yes really) out in LA, go to mood bar again for some harry potter thing. all get drunk and persuade them to change their whole plans while theyre travelling around in cali for a few weeks and come south with us to san diego. so team spaz is born and road trip begins two days later! san diego, v nice, love fact big going out bit with all the bars next door to each other, more like home, called the gaslamp district and close to hostel. hiddeously drunk surprsie surprise on the first night, big game of ring of fire at the hostel, make it out about 1 when everything closes about 2! not much memory on everyones behalf (i certainly hope).. couple of days there, the world famous san diego zoo! pretty fun. felt like watching anchorman! then head down to mexico.. ensendada for fiorst couple of nights. really nice, actually feels like a mexican town, end up at this amazing salsa/samba club where they had live band and people dancing on stage. puts us to shame with our wiggling of the hips and hands in the air (yes all the cool kids dance like that)all absolutely amazing dancers, as in just the locals, not professional dancers or anything. we completely fitted in! became fluent in spanish again obvisouly. loved speaking it, determined to have lessons when get back... fi?! flea market, blow hole, margaritas.. head up the coast a bit to rosarito,also nice though more touristy, apparently is the new TJ... $10 all you can drink night. big mistake. heinously drunk yet again and this time no memory at all. same for eveyone else... i hope. am going to have to start those chris tarrant memory books when i get home. head up to Tijuana, last stop in mexico. feeling horrific/def still drunk. dont even realise i have one of my contacts in when wearing my glasses. TJ pretty horrible, feels too magaluf style, way too aimed at the tourist and people literally dragging you into their bar/restaurant offering free tequila shots at about 1pm. not too tempting/feel a bit like an alcoholic even if sober, feeling hungover then mention of the word almsot makes me gag. 'i swear im never drinking again' (i have to say actually i've kind of stuck to that so far, def havent had a night like that.. i went behind the bar of the club we were in and started making cocktails while speaking perfect mexican and jumping on the bar. oh dear.) leave mexico next day, back to hostel cat in san diego for a night. to joshua tree national park next day to camp... watch out for snakes and bees. mmm my favourite. funny night of 4 man ring of fire with wine and leftover margarita mix. am clever and start drinking water towards the end. feel slightly smug and v happy the next day when its about 90 degrees at 7am and the others are feeling pretty shocking. dont think i could handle a hangover in that heat. next day drive to flagstaff in arizona. smaaalll town, everyone feeling v tired and bit ill.. still recovering a bit from mexico, cleverly drank the tap water without even thinking... navajo indian reserve and monument valley the next day, amazing scenery. monument valley where all the western films shot. went on a horseride through it, local taking us 4 out, not matter the boys had never riden and me and laura werent exactly experts, we were galloping along (the guy had no time for strolling through, had to keep up with the wild horse he was riding bareback!) through the shrubs and sand alongside these massive red rock formations. truly spectacular. the aching thighs, layers of skin taken off of my ankle as my shoes kept almost falling off and walking like john wayne for a bit were totally all worth it. i have also decided i want to take up horseriding when i get back too. back to flagstaff for night and then grand canyon next day to camp again. beautiful and something like you've never seen before.. we are all indian jones style v brave and climb onto some outer rocks, make you feel a little sick and sweaty when you look down (even though was doing so on my belly pulling myself along!) camp, FREEZING all night, barely sleep, watch sunrise, back to flagstaff where boys drop us off and we have an emotional farewell as they leave for vegas and us for phoenix. phoenix bit crap. get overnight coach to roswell, v fun. but at least had our own seats to stretch-ish out on. shocking 'sleep' though. spend the say walking through the town... ie. walking about 15 minutes from our motel room to a parade of a couple of cafes, souvenir shops, clothes shop, v small town type stuff and EVERYTHING geared or related or have a picture of aliens. go to ufo museum, nothing like the one in the prog and im very sad to see it looks nothing like it (yes yes i know its filmed in LA) as the woman behind the gift counter at the museum says, 'they make it look a lot nicer in the programme', so she clearly thinks a lot of the town! almost dont make it out of roswell as forget to purchase our ticket from the teeny desk which shuts at 5.30 (most others open all night, although cant really expect much!) luckily bus driver gives us one (oi not like that you dirty minded people) and we have another fun overnighter to dallas, we did have to ask is this the way to amarillo as we had to change there. it was so we tried to fall asleep hugging our pillow, dreaming dreams of amarillo. got to dallas, nice and humid, feeling rank and tired from long journey and then to realise we had nowhere to stay and no number to call. A LOT of yellow paging it later and then having to make a trip to the library, which on route to, my suitcase that i bought in san diego (when we dragged the boys into target, and then where they spent $150 and we had to drag them out. what a place) after my other one broke, bloody tesco value, so felt like i was literally dragging rocks, in my smelly and hot tshirt and tracky bums in horrible humid weather. think quite a few swear words were shouted which i obvisouly cant repeat here and will never say again. which brings us here top tonight, to hotel indigo which is really beaut and really not helping with our 'we really have to tighten the purse strings' beginning. but as i said, we got cereal and milk so i am happy for brekkie, lunch and dinner. should prob get some fruit as well. anyway, tired of typing, some crazy old women in recption screeching, and we have to try and get up early to do lots of touristy stuff (jfk shooting scene mainly, little morbid but has to be done as we're here) so sorry this is a bit rambling, doesnt really flow or make sense but internet time is precious and flies by! will try update more often and less. off to austin for a day then new orleans after here, so looking forward to some jazz and blues dancing!!
Giant flying crickets in dallas... only made it out of the hotel for some nightlife spotting (hmmm) for about an hour before we had to return, well run and jump and scream, to the hotel because they were so horrific. cant describe how bad, people prob thinking bit pathetic but they are EVERYWHERE. and HUGE. i've decided i actually like cockroaches after enduring those for a night. shudder.
So much more need to tell from before, missed out a huge chunk... so back in time, not sure where to start... vegas, amazing, too hot, rank hot dry wind, cant go out during the day, (original casino owner is a genius) but fun in casinos, although everyone v serious about the gambling and me and laura know very little and putting bets of $20 (high rollers), go to studio 54, see hundreds of brides and wedding parties, stay at the mgm, beautiful room, unfortunately dont make our millions or see george or brad. little disappointing. see hoover dam and then back to poor mike's for a bit after im sure he thought he was rid of us for good! have bit of worrying jounrey for a bit when the 'engine transmission exhaust or sth' light comes on telling us something is wrong. decide best way to deal with it is to keep on driving as quickly as possible to get back to LA. miraculously, no idea how, the light turns itself off so the clever car sorted itself out (i think it was my excellent driving which did so).
back in LA, chill, try to sort rest of stay out for a bit. meet laura's friend's friend's friends (yes really) out in LA, go to mood bar again for some harry potter thing. all get drunk and persuade them to change their whole plans while theyre travelling around in cali for a few weeks and come south with us to san diego. so team spaz is born and road trip begins two days later! san diego, v nice, love fact big going out bit with all the bars next door to each other, more like home, called the gaslamp district and close to hostel. hiddeously drunk surprsie surprise on the first night, big game of ring of fire at the hostel, make it out about 1 when everything closes about 2! not much memory on everyones behalf (i certainly hope).. couple of days there, the world famous san diego zoo! pretty fun. felt like watching anchorman! then head down to mexico.. ensendada for fiorst couple of nights. really nice, actually feels like a mexican town, end up at this amazing salsa/samba club where they had live band and people dancing on stage. puts us to shame with our wiggling of the hips and hands in the air (yes all the cool kids dance like that)all absolutely amazing dancers, as in just the locals, not professional dancers or anything. we completely fitted in! became fluent in spanish again obvisouly. loved speaking it, determined to have lessons when get back... fi?! flea market, blow hole, margaritas.. head up the coast a bit to rosarito,also nice though more touristy, apparently is the new TJ... $10 all you can drink night. big mistake. heinously drunk yet again and this time no memory at all. same for eveyone else... i hope. am going to have to start those chris tarrant memory books when i get home. head up to Tijuana, last stop in mexico. feeling horrific/def still drunk. dont even realise i have one of my contacts in when wearing my glasses. TJ pretty horrible, feels too magaluf style, way too aimed at the tourist and people literally dragging you into their bar/restaurant offering free tequila shots at about 1pm. not too tempting/feel a bit like an alcoholic even if sober, feeling hungover then mention of the word almsot makes me gag. 'i swear im never drinking again' (i have to say actually i've kind of stuck to that so far, def havent had a night like that.. i went behind the bar of the club we were in and started making cocktails while speaking perfect mexican and jumping on the bar. oh dear.) leave mexico next day, back to hostel cat in san diego for a night. to joshua tree national park next day to camp... watch out for snakes and bees. mmm my favourite. funny night of 4 man ring of fire with wine and leftover margarita mix. am clever and start drinking water towards the end. feel slightly smug and v happy the next day when its about 90 degrees at 7am and the others are feeling pretty shocking. dont think i could handle a hangover in that heat. next day drive to flagstaff in arizona. smaaalll town, everyone feeling v tired and bit ill.. still recovering a bit from mexico, cleverly drank the tap water without even thinking... navajo indian reserve and monument valley the next day, amazing scenery. monument valley where all the western films shot. went on a horseride through it, local taking us 4 out, not matter the boys had never riden and me and laura werent exactly experts, we were galloping along (the guy had no time for strolling through, had to keep up with the wild horse he was riding bareback!) through the shrubs and sand alongside these massive red rock formations. truly spectacular. the aching thighs, layers of skin taken off of my ankle as my shoes kept almost falling off and walking like john wayne for a bit were totally all worth it. i have also decided i want to take up horseriding when i get back too. back to flagstaff for night and then grand canyon next day to camp again. beautiful and something like you've never seen before.. we are all indian jones style v brave and climb onto some outer rocks, make you feel a little sick and sweaty when you look down (even though was doing so on my belly pulling myself along!) camp, FREEZING all night, barely sleep, watch sunrise, back to flagstaff where boys drop us off and we have an emotional farewell as they leave for vegas and us for phoenix. phoenix bit crap. get overnight coach to roswell, v fun. but at least had our own seats to stretch-ish out on. shocking 'sleep' though. spend the say walking through the town... ie. walking about 15 minutes from our motel room to a parade of a couple of cafes, souvenir shops, clothes shop, v small town type stuff and EVERYTHING geared or related or have a picture of aliens. go to ufo museum, nothing like the one in the prog and im very sad to see it looks nothing like it (yes yes i know its filmed in LA) as the woman behind the gift counter at the museum says, 'they make it look a lot nicer in the programme', so she clearly thinks a lot of the town! almost dont make it out of roswell as forget to purchase our ticket from the teeny desk which shuts at 5.30 (most others open all night, although cant really expect much!) luckily bus driver gives us one (oi not like that you dirty minded people) and we have another fun overnighter to dallas, we did have to ask is this the way to amarillo as we had to change there. it was so we tried to fall asleep hugging our pillow, dreaming dreams of amarillo. got to dallas, nice and humid, feeling rank and tired from long journey and then to realise we had nowhere to stay and no number to call. A LOT of yellow paging it later and then having to make a trip to the library, which on route to, my suitcase that i bought in san diego (when we dragged the boys into target, and then where they spent $150 and we had to drag them out. what a place) after my other one broke, bloody tesco value, so felt like i was literally dragging rocks, in my smelly and hot tshirt and tracky bums in horrible humid weather. think quite a few swear words were shouted which i obvisouly cant repeat here and will never say again. which brings us here top tonight, to hotel indigo which is really beaut and really not helping with our 'we really have to tighten the purse strings' beginning. but as i said, we got cereal and milk so i am happy for brekkie, lunch and dinner. should prob get some fruit as well. anyway, tired of typing, some crazy old women in recption screeching, and we have to try and get up early to do lots of touristy stuff (jfk shooting scene mainly, little morbid but has to be done as we're here) so sorry this is a bit rambling, doesnt really flow or make sense but internet time is precious and flies by! will try update more often and less. off to austin for a day then new orleans after here, so looking forward to some jazz and blues dancing!!
Friday, July 6, 2007
So here I am in Laguna Beach library and unfortunately this seems to be the best thing about it (free use of internet). It's muggy and cloudy, I recognise none of the locations from the TV prog (yes, that is mainly why I came. loser schmoser han), have seen none of the people, its really expensive and the beach isnt even very nice! We're actually staying in newport, about 20 minutes north (where currently it is sunny and beautiful!), planning on staying here last night but compared to our (slightly strange and scary) $65 a night motel up there we were greeted with bargain prices of, cheapest, about $150 a night. As it is so close though figured we'd go back to newport and then drive down today so we can get a proper feel for it. Well the proper feel isn't great and its our last day of 'beach holiday' for a while! boo. ah well, we learn and grow from our mistakes.
Newport on the other hand we really like... although i think 5 days is also enough time there. There's the main pier/peninsula area with all the bars/restaurants etc... when i say all i mean there are pretty much 2 main ones - Sharkeez and District - which 'close down' at about midnight as they are full to capacity. me and laura not knowing this trundle out of our room after a nice bottle of vino about 11.30 and head into town... not even our puppy dog eyed look, english accents and lauras boobs could get past those bouncers (as someone later said to me 'yeah but theyre used to dealing with models etc everyday'. thanks.) luckily we have made friends with some of the people in town... after i backed into their fire hydrant, while they were watching from the roof, and then invited us to park in their driveway and have drinks from the fully stocked/working bar they had in the sitting room while watching the sun go down over the sea from the roof - they literally live but one house from the beach. nice. so meet them and they take us to this slightly biker-ish style bar! apparently tommy, the guy whos house it is, says that most people get into clubs at this time by doing the handshake with bill inside! classic. ooh, anyway time about to run out so will continue another time... off to vegas tomorrow baby!!
Newport on the other hand we really like... although i think 5 days is also enough time there. There's the main pier/peninsula area with all the bars/restaurants etc... when i say all i mean there are pretty much 2 main ones - Sharkeez and District - which 'close down' at about midnight as they are full to capacity. me and laura not knowing this trundle out of our room after a nice bottle of vino about 11.30 and head into town... not even our puppy dog eyed look, english accents and lauras boobs could get past those bouncers (as someone later said to me 'yeah but theyre used to dealing with models etc everyday'. thanks.) luckily we have made friends with some of the people in town... after i backed into their fire hydrant, while they were watching from the roof, and then invited us to park in their driveway and have drinks from the fully stocked/working bar they had in the sitting room while watching the sun go down over the sea from the roof - they literally live but one house from the beach. nice. so meet them and they take us to this slightly biker-ish style bar! apparently tommy, the guy whos house it is, says that most people get into clubs at this time by doing the handshake with bill inside! classic. ooh, anyway time about to run out so will continue another time... off to vegas tomorrow baby!!
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